Apr 13, 2012, 8:30 PM EST
No children or small animals were harmed in the making of the following video.
On the other hand, emotional scarring cannot be ruled out for watching the thing.
Dominic Oduro may or may not be the fastest may in MLS. I’d wager my Chicago Fire Quaker Oats jersey (Prized and personalized!) that Colorado’s Marvell Wynne could make a great race of it, at very least.
But we know for sure that Oduro can beat a couple of pasty white guys, including one in a Royal Tenenbaums headband and pink muscle shirt. Yes, it’s quite a hideous and disturbing site.
Thanks to Chicago Fire communications man Brendan Hannan for giggles on this one. And let us all pray for his torn hammy. He did a remarkable job of hiding it – but I think we can all feel the tear as we watch this fiasco unfold.
Jan 26, 2015, 9:20 AM EST
The signing of two Venezuelan youngsters could put Real in plenty of trouble with FIFA, as Barcelona-esque transfer ban could be on the cards.
Jan 26, 2015, 8:34 AM EST
The Koreans will face either Australia or the UAE in Saturday’s final in Sydney.
Jan 26, 2015, 8:00 AM EST
All the latest gossip, right here.
Jan 25, 2015, 11:33 PM EST
“I am concerned, not because of Chelsea but because we didn’t score in our last two home games,” Pellegrini said.
Jan 25, 2015, 10:50 PM EST
The 33-year-old Cameroonian striker joins a Sampdoria side currently tied for third in the table with 34 points.
Jan 25, 2015, 10:13 PM EST
“If he’s not ready for Tuesday then he’ll be back, for sure, against West Ham next weekend,” Rodgers said.
Jan 25, 2015, 9:22 PM EST
Maloney turned 32 on Saturday and will be unveiled by Chicago on Monday.
Jan 25, 2015, 8:31 PM EST
Sepp Blatter: Kind of like “The Godfather”. But let’s be clear, we’re talking “The Godfather: Part III”.
Jan 25, 2015, 7:40 PM EST
What else is cooking? Glad you asked.
Jan 25, 2015, 6:30 PM EST
There’s a new top-four team in Spain, while little has changed in Italy, both for good and bad.
Jan 25, 2015, 4:28 PM EST
Two of eight quarterfinals places were clinched on Sunday as the late drama continues at AFCON 2015.
Jan 25, 2015, 2:59 PM EST
A work permit still must be obtained, but Arsenal is on the cusp of securing some defensive depth.
Jan 25, 2015, 2:07 PM EST
With 10 goals in his last six games, all of that is coming to a screeching halt.
Jan 25, 2015, 12:54 PM EST
After yesterday’s FA Cup craziness, things were restored to normal today as all three Premier League sides went through, despite some nervy moments.
Jan 25, 2015, 11:43 AM EST
Standard Liege fans responded to their former player – now with their arch rivals – in a very mean way. Defour reacted accordingly.
Jan 25, 2015, 10:46 AM EST
Four goals in his last four games has Paul Pogba on top of the world.
Jan 25, 2015, 10:16 AM EST
Aston Villa secured the services of midfielder Fabian Delph, and while that should have been an exciting announcement, the club blew it up a little too much and it fell flat on its face.
Jan 25, 2015, 9:23 AM EST
Mohamed Salah just needed signatures to make him a Roma player, but now the Italian club could be headed in a different direction.
Jan 25, 2015, 7:52 AM EST
Which is Balotelli and which is the practice dummy? It sounds like it’s harder for Brendan Rodgers to tell every day.
Jan 24, 2015, 11:00 PM EST
The bitterness is flowing freely from Falcao’s agent as he plots the Colombian striker’s next move to a “world’s best-seven team.”
- Transfer ban for Real Madrid? Probe launched after signing of Venezuelan kids 0
- Transfer rumor roundup: Ings to Tottenham Hotspur, Busquets to Manchester United 0
- Rodgers: Sturridge could face Chelsea in League Cup, certain to be back for Saturday vs. West Ham 0
- Sepp Blatter keeps talking trash at UEFA regarding FIFA election 4
- Sunday’s transfer rumor roundup: Konoplyanka to Everton, Clyne to Old Trafford 0
- Africa Cup of Nations roundup: Congo, Equatorial Guinea victorious in group finales, advance 0