May 23, 2012, 3:15 PM EDT
Joey Barton needs a good shaking. Or something.
But since we’re an evolved species, and since Barton isn’t a little toddler throwing a temper tantrum – ahem, we’re all thinking the same thing, so let’s just move on – we don’t do those kinds of things.
So instead of a good shaking, or a right proper spanking, even, the English FA has banned the naughty boy from Queens Park Rangers for 12 matches.
He’s also been fined £75,000 (about $117,000) for being soccer’s version of the unstable Michael Douglas character from Falling Down.
Barton was sent off from QPR’s loss to Manchester City on the final EPL match day for clashing tin Carlos Tevez. In the ensuing maelstrom of mayhem, Barton kicked City’s Sergio Aguero and attempted to head butt Vincent Kompany.
As my Twitter buddy Abram Chamberlain (@MindOfAbram) said: If I’m QPR, I’m seeing if I can sell Joey Barton to a League 1 side for £17, some scones and a cup of Earl Grey.
Well said, indeed.
May 28, 2015, 5:25 PM EDT
Bob Ley joins the Men in Blazers to talk about the FIFA arrests and decades of corruption inside world football’s governing body.
May 28, 2015, 4:56 PM EDT
With the 2014-15 season in the books, clubs are already busy making moves for next season. Where should each club focus their efforts (and $$$)?
May 28, 2015, 3:25 PM EDT
Going over the highs and lows, the surprises and disappointments, plus much more from the PL season that was, here’s the latest PST Extra.
May 28, 2015, 2:33 PM EDT
Remember these 10 matches from the 2014-15 season? Here’s highlights from them all.
May 28, 2015, 1:35 PM EDT
Burnley and Chelsea will find their names often amongst the top stat men in the Premier League this season.
May 28, 2015, 12:57 PM EDT
Liverpool legend will be heading to California soon, says Bruce Arena.
May 28, 2015, 12:08 PM EDT
FIFA’s long-time president has addressed the congress in Zurich about the shocking allegations of corruption.
May 28, 2015, 11:25 AM EDT
UEFA to discuss possibility of walking away from FIFA in Berlin next month.
May 28, 2015, 10:05 AM EDT
UEFA’s chief pleads with Blatter to walk away as world soccer’s governing body is in ruins.
May 28, 2015, 9:31 AM EDT
PHOTOS & VIDEO: Women’s players are available in the FIFA video game series for the first time.
May 28, 2015, 9:00 AM EDT
Former Valencia, Liverpool boss has called time in Naples as his hometown is calling.
May 28, 2015, 7:51 AM EDT
The Russian president finds it “odd” that the FBI is chasing down FIFA officials…
May 28, 2015, 12:53 AM EDT
Juninho’s early PK is all the Galaxy need, as they climb to 4th in the Western Conference. RSL, meanwhile, are on the outside looking in.
May 28, 2015, 12:43 AM EDT
17 MLS teams will entire this year’s US Open Cup in the 4th round. On Wednesday, they learned who they’ll face.
May 28, 2015, 12:30 AM EDT
Wins in May don’t get much more “must-win” than this one. PDX tops the East’s top team.
May 27, 2015, 8:15 PM EDT
According to his agent, Balotelli is going nowhere this summer. He’ll stay and fight for his place next season.
May 27, 2015, 6:15 PM EDT
11 current and former officials from around the world have been provisionally banned from all football-related activities.
May 27, 2015, 5:23 PM EDT
Rog and Davo relive the Premier League’s season finale, including squeaky bum time at the bottom of the table.
May 27, 2015, 4:42 PM EDT
It was a thrilling Europa League final. Sevilla are back-to-back Europa League champions, and into next year’s Champions League.
May 27, 2015, 4:32 PM EDT
Sergio Aguero was the Premier League’s top goalscorer this season, but was he the best attacker in the league? He has plenty of competition.
- 2014-15 Premier League season review: Summer transfer needs 0
- VIDEO: Premier League 2014-15 review – Top 10 games of the season 2
- By the numbers: 2014-15 Premier League season in review 0
- Sepp Blatter transcript in full; admits “shame and humiliation” of FIFA scandal 3
- UEFA could leave FIFA if Blatter stays on, as support for Prince Ali grows 22
- Sepp Blatter refuses to quit as FIFA president despite plea from UEFA’s Michel Platini 9