Skip to content

“Oh, my goodness!” … Yes, this is one poor penalty kick

Nov 15, 2012, 12:55 PM EST

FBL-US-COLOMBIA-BRAZIL

I have a theory on penalty kicks: The more tricked up a shooter makes it, the higher his chances rise of 12-yard, spot shot catastrophe. (Not to mention the attached YouTube infamy.)

I think we can all agree that launching a penalty kick into the upper deck qualifies as relative catastrophe. I mean, you know it’s bad when players on the other team clearly feel sorry for  you.

Here is Neymar’s shot from last night’s 1-1 draw between Brazil and Colombia inside the, uh, let’s go with “under-supported” MetLife Stadium. (In other words, at least there weren’t that many people around to watch Brazil’s young star blow it big time in the late going.)

Here’s the wayward shot, one that Neymar complicated by screwing the ball inexplicably into the turf, taking a funky, dance-step initial run-up and even further muddling the move with the always dicey stutter step.

Seriously, guys, just pick a side and hit it. It’s a penalty kick, after all, not a Rubik’s Cube to be solved:

.

Latest Posts
  1. WATCH: Perth Glory substitute gets sent off after 17 seconds

    Nov 23, 2014, 11:50 AM EST

    Zadkovich Getty Images

    Fastest ever red card? It certainly has a shout after Australian completes an ugly tackle straight after coming on.

  2. Watch Live: Hull City vs Tottenham Hotspur (Lineups)

    Nov 23, 2014, 10:48 AM EST

    Pochettino AP

    Mauricio Pochettino has called on Ben Davies and five others to fix things for Spurs, as both sides make a whopping six changes to their lineups from last weekend.

  3. Crystal Palace 3-1 Liverpool: Bolasie carves up Liverpool defense

    Nov 23, 2014, 10:26 AM EST

    Palace Getty Images

    Yannick Bolasie was a force down both flanks as Neil Warnock’s Crystal Palace pulls out of the relegation zone.

  4. David Moyes details plane troubles ahead of Real Sociedad debut

    Nov 23, 2014, 10:01 AM EST

    Moyes Getty Images

    David Moyes began his tenure in Spain with a 0-0 draw, but there was more to it than that.

  5. Report: Marco Reus is out for rest of 2014 with torn ankle ligament

    Nov 23, 2014, 8:19 AM EST

    Reus AP

    After missing the World Cup while rehabbing a serious ankle injury, Marco Reus is faced with yet another long road back.

  6. Watch Live: Crystal Palace vs Liverpool (Lineups)

    Nov 23, 2014, 7:48 AM EST

    Lambert Getty Images

    With Daniel Sturridge shelved for weeks and Mario Balotelli unable to get past a groin knock, Liverpool turns to Rickie Lambert to produce goals at Selhurst Park.

  7. Milan derby: Return of Roberto Mancini sets the stage for classic Serie A rivalry

    Nov 22, 2014, 11:59 PM EST

    esteban_cambiasso Getty Images

    On Sunday, AC Milan will play host to rivals Inter Milan in “derby della Madonnina”, and Roberto Mancini is back.

  8. Tim Cahill thinks Red Bulls are plainly ‘better’ than New England Revolution

    Nov 22, 2014, 9:47 PM EST

    Tim Cahill 2

    New York Red Bulls’ Designated Player Tim Cahill is far from doubting his team’s capabilities against the New England Revolution in the Eastern Conference Championship on Sunday.

  9. Jose Mourinho apologizes for criticizing supporters, grateful for Blues’ triumph over West Brom

    Nov 22, 2014, 7:12 PM EST

    Chelsea FC v FC Schalke 04 - UEFA Champions League Getty Images

    Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho apologized to supporters for criticizing the stadium atmosphere, while praising his team’s play in a 2-0 blanking of West Brom.

  10. Arsene Wenger on loss to Manchester United: ‘We dominated 80 percent of the time’

    Nov 22, 2014, 5:15 PM EST

    Everton v Arsenal - Premier League Getty Images

    His squad controlling possession and gathering a fair amount of chances on goal, Arsene Wenger believes his side deserved a better result against Manchester United.

  11. Premier League Sunday preview: Liverpool, Spurs take to road to face fellow strugglers Palace, Hull

    Nov 22, 2014, 5:03 PM EST

    Britain Soccer Premier League AP

    One game is a rematch of the 3-3 draw that left Luis Suarez in tears, but both Palace and Liverpool have much bigger things to worry about.

  12. Bundesliga roundup: Gotze, Lewandowski lead Bayern rout; Reus hurt in BVB draw

    Nov 22, 2014, 4:45 PM EST

    Germany Soccer Bundesliga AP

    Elsewhere, USMNT defenders Timmy Chandler (right) and John Anthony Brooks picked up wins in 90 minutes each for their clubs.

  13. Alan Pardew, Newcastle organization wishing the best for Ryan Taylor’s recovery

    Nov 22, 2014, 4:25 PM EST

    alan_pardew Getty Images

    Despite an wonderful 1-0 result over QPR to keep their winning run alive, Alan Pardew feels the pain of Ryan Taylor’s sudden injury.

  14. “Always annoyed” Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho: “At halftime it should be four or five nil”

    Nov 22, 2014, 3:38 PM EST

    Chelsea v West Bromwich Albion - Premier League Getty Images

    This season, he has all his players and no excuses. So The Special One is a little ticked off that his Blues aren’t pouring forth goals to match their dominant play.

  15. Alan Irvine calls Costa goal offside, bright spot was spectacular Ben Foster

    Nov 22, 2014, 3:35 PM EST

    alan_irvine Getty Images

    Irvine: “We actually went a goal down to a goal which I thought was offside and that makes life very difficult here.”

Featured video

Week 12: PL Saturday recap