I have a theory on penalty kicks: The more tricked up a shooter makes it, the higher his chances rise of 12-yard, spot shot catastrophe. (Not to mention the attached YouTube infamy.)
I think we can all agree that launching a penalty kick into the upper deck qualifies as relative catastrophe. I mean, you know it’s bad when players on the other team clearly feel sorry for you.
Here is Neymar’s shot from last night’s 1-1 draw between Brazil and Colombia inside the, uh, let’s go with “under-supported” MetLife Stadium. (In other words, at least there weren’t that many people around to watch Brazil’s young star blow it big time in the late going.)
Here’s the wayward shot, one that Neymar complicated by screwing the ball inexplicably into the turf, taking a funky, dance-step initial run-up and even further muddling the move with the always dicey stutter step.
Seriously, guys, just pick a side and hit it. It’s a penalty kick, after all, not a Rubik’s Cube to be solved:
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Poor Strama, Allegri: Inter, AC Milan leave coaches in limbo
May 22, 2013, 11:51 PM EDT
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Serie A’s two Milanese clubs have yet to move for new head coaches.
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Full circle: Misantrope’s revival could land Benítez in Paris, Madrid, or Naples
May 22, 2013, 11:06 PM EDT
Over the last three months, Rafa Benítez has reignited a floundering career.
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It’s piling on for Reign FC, who may permanently lose Megan Rapinoe to Lyon
May 22, 2013, 10:14 PM EDT
The hits just keep on coming for the NWSL’s hard-luck team.
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U.S. Open Cup Fourth Round draw: What it means for your MLS team
May 22, 2013, 9:20 PM EDT
The U.S. Open Cup draws sometimes need a decoder ring to decipher. Here’s a quick-and-dirty look at the MLS teams’ futures.
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With PSG willing to match Wayne Rooney’s wages, Manchester United has somebody to bail them out
May 22, 2013, 8:17 PM EDT
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If PSG’s willing to take Rooney’s wages of their hands, Manchester United can justify moving on.
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Crimes and misdemeanors: Congratulations, Bobby Boswell – you’re this week’s winner
May 22, 2013, 7:32 PM EDT
Houston’s defensive leader sees his banned doubled by the Disciplinary Committee.
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Sauerbrunn, Quon, and why its still too early to see NWSL’s influence on Sermanni’s choices
May 22, 2013, 6:47 PM EDT
Tom Sermanni has brought new talent into the national team, but it’s too early to know the extent to which the U.S.’s roster will see new faces.
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José Mourinho, Cristiano Ronaldo pick up meaningless two-match bans
May 22, 2013, 6:02 PM EDT
Cristiano Ronaldo will serve a two-match ban. José Mourinho will skirt it.
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Looking at the United States’ roster ahead of their Canada rematch
May 22, 2013, 4:03 PM EDT
Yesterday’s announcement included few surprises ahead of the U.S.’s June 2 match at BMO Field.
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How Tony Pulis removal at Stoke City may affect U.S. internationals Cameron, Shea and Edu
May 22, 2013, 2:40 PM EDT
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Looks like a mixed bag for the American trio:
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Getty Images
As the towering English forward weighs up his options, should he return to Liverpool, sign for West Ham or go elsewhere?
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Mario Götze to miss Champions League final against future club Bayern
May 22, 2013, 1:40 PM EDT
Reuters
With Dortmund’s main attacker threat out injured, can Dortmund still lift the Champions League trophy?
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AP
Can the Yankees provide a viable option for New York City FC to play in? Of course they can. Maybe.
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The one accolade no EPL player wants on their soccer resume…
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Claudio Reyna announced as New York City FC Director of Football
May 22, 2013, 11:05 AM EDT
New York City FC announces Reyna as first employee, a good first move, right?




