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This is why we can’t have nice things: Chelsea out of Champions League

Dec 5, 2012, 6:24 PM EDT


Chelsea blew away Nordsjælland — and not a moment too soon, as I’m growing very tired of typing the team of Michael Parkhurst — but Juventus’ 1-0 defeat of Shakhtar Donetsk rendered the result at Stamford Bridge meaningless: The Blues are the first defending champion to fail to reach the knockout stage.

It’s also the first time in 11 appearances that Chelsea has not gotten out of the group stage. That’s actually really impressive on a number of different levels, almost none of them good.

Silver linings? Well, six goals! That’s a lot. And Chelsea sits in third place in the English Premier League. So they have that going for them. And Fernando Torres scored two goals, which is always fun. And their owner still has more money than like all of Denmark. And Rafa Benitez hasn’t been fired. Yet.

  1. mianfr - Dec 5, 2012 at 7:05 PM

    Sorry, can we talk about tie-breakers for a second? Doesn’t Chelsea have equal points and a better goal differential than Chelsea at this point?

    Did UEFA apply the Euro tiebreak rules to the Champion’s League as well?

    I can’t think of another explanation, and no one is writing about in the articles or during the games, so I’m at a loss.

    • dws110 - Dec 5, 2012 at 7:49 PM

      I’m pretty sure that Chelsea is tied with Chelsea on both points and goal differential.

      I see what you did there.

      • mianfr - Dec 5, 2012 at 9:03 PM

        Heh. My bad.

  2. notoriouswarsaw - Dec 5, 2012 at 7:19 PM

    the first tie breaker if 2 teams have the same points is head to head points which was tied, them the second tie breaker was head to head goals scored also tied, next is head to head goal differential also tied, the fourth tie breaker is head to head away goals which shaktar won 2 to 1. overall goal differential in this situation isn’t till the 5th or 6th tie breaker

  3. dws110 - Dec 5, 2012 at 7:45 PM

    Farewell, Rafa, we hardly knew ye! The cynic in me thinks he only took the job for the fat contract buyout when Abramovich fires him.

  4. joeyt360 - Dec 6, 2012 at 6:29 PM

    Dude! Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V. Copy-paste it, bro!

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