Skip to content

Over/under on Carlos Ruiz time at D.C. United? Let’s go with “six months”

Feb 21, 2013, 11:03 AM EDT

Guatemala's Ruiz keeps his eyes on the ball as he battles for it against Bocanegra of the U.S. during 2014 World Cup qualifying soccer match in Kansas City

Yes, Carlos Ruiz will continue to be a little bundle of frustration for opposition defenses; truly, he is one of the most confounding men ever to wear an MLS kit.

And, yes, Ruiz’s historic striking proficiency is impressive. His raw numbers speak volumes, as Ruiz owns one of the best goals-to-games ratio Major League Soccer has yet seen.

But I’m calling it right here: the hook-up with D.C. United will not work.

United signed the Guatemalan striker Wednesday, turning over the hour glass on a fifth MLS team for Ruiz.

First, Ruiz is 33. And it’s a hard 33. He was never a player ultimately interested in fitness and taking care of himself as a professional should. He’s the anti-Dwayne De Rosario that way. “De Ro” has always gone to great lengths to professionally look after his body.

Second, United manager Ben Olsen isn’t going to put up with Ruiz’s shenanigans. He won’t if he’s smart, at least. First time Ruiz turns up AWOL – it happened a lot in his days in Dallas – Olsen should personally clean out the man’s locker, leave the contents in a box and set it outside RFK Stadium for collection whenever Ruiz gets back into the city.

Nor will Olsen put up with Ruiz’s lack of attention to defensive detail and duty. He can’t just drag himself around the field awaiting his next chance to post up as a target. Especially not when fellow United striker Lionard Pajoy is around, a guy who doesn’t have Ruiz’s finishing skill or instincts but who is definitely willing to put in the work.

Ruiz is done with the Guatemalan national team, so that potential distraction is no longer in play. (Ruiz’s previous episodes of going AWOL were frequently attached to trips back home, when his return was mysteriously delayed on several occasions.)

And since he is 33, and since this is his eighth club since 2007 – indicating that Ruiz wears out his welcome quite quickly – perhaps the combative striker will get it. Perhaps he’ll get in line, recognizing that his window of collecting a paycheck in pro soccer is closing.

I rather doubt it, and history is on my side here.

Good luck to him. Despite it all, Ruiz has always been a likeable sort.

Still, I put the over/under on his RFK stay at six months. Which side are you taking?

Latest Posts
  1. Juventus lose Sami Khedira for 2 months to hamstring tear

    Aug 3, 2015, 5:35 PM EDT

    Khedira Getty Images

    A massive blow to Juventus puts them on alert for midfield cover.

  2. Will this year’s Liverpool spending spree work better than the last?

    Aug 3, 2015, 5:00 PM EDT

    FirminoBenteke Getty Images

    Liverpool has spent big for the second straight summer, but it appears the Reds may have learned a valuable lesson.

  3. Lyon announces deal for Manchester United wing-back Rafael

    Aug 3, 2015, 3:48 PM EDT

    Rafael Getty Images

    Rafael’s rocky seven-year tenure with Manchester United is over as he heads to France.

  4. Premier League Goalkeeper preview: Who’s in our Top Five, and who switched clubs?

    Aug 3, 2015, 3:00 PM EDT

    <> at Emirates Stadium on July 28, 2015 in London, England. Getty Images

    Not a great deal has changed in the world of Premier League goalkeepers this offseason, but among the differences is a huge one: Petr Cech has moved from Chelsea to Arsenal.

  5. Best starting lineups for all 20 Premier League teams – Do you agree?

    Aug 3, 2015, 2:25 PM EDT

    PST selects the strongest XI’s for each PL team ahead of the 2015-16 season. Let us know what you think.

  6. Cristiano Ronaldo, Karim Benzema out injured for Real Madrid

    Aug 3, 2015, 1:00 PM EDT

    Real Madrid v Schalke 04 - UEFA Champions League Real Madrid v Schalke 04 - UEFA Champions League

    Forwards both left off Real’s Audi Cup squad after training ground injuries.

  7. Monday’s Transfer Rumor Roundup: Van Dijk to Southampton, Benzema to Arsenal

    Aug 3, 2015, 12:15 PM EDT

    All of the latest gossip from around the PL, right here.

  8. VIDEO: Watch Arsene Wenger snub Jose Mourinho handshake. Who is in the wrong?

    Aug 3, 2015, 11:30 AM EDT

    Arsenal v Chelsea - Premier League Preview Getty Images

    Wenger and Mourinho’s feud continues, but should both manager’s bite the bullet and make up?

  9. Paris Saint-Germain a “step up” from Manchester United for Angel di Maria

    Aug 3, 2015, 10:42 AM EDT

    FBL-FRA-LIGUE1-PSG-NICE Getty Images

    PSG’s skipper Silva is risking the wrath of United’s fans around the globe.

  10. Cristiano Ronaldo buys his agent a Greek island… as a wedding gift

    Aug 3, 2015, 9:40 AM EDT

    Cristiano Ronaldo Signs Contract Renewal For Real Madrid Getty Images

    Real Madrid superstar is a baller on and off the pitch.

  11. MLS Snapshot: Chicago Fire 2-0 FC Dallas (video)

    Aug 2, 2015, 9:15 PM EDT

    Accam Getty Images

    David Accam helped lead Chicago Fire over FC Dallas to end the visitors five-game winning streak.

  12. WATCH: Ex-Barcelona midfielder Xavi scores a wonderful free-kick on debut for Qatari club

    Aug 2, 2015, 8:06 PM EDT

    Xavi Getty Images

    Xavi gets up for preseason friendlies, and in his first match for his new club, the 35-year-old rips a classic free kick.

  13. MLS Snapshot: San Jose Earthquakes 0-0 Portland Timbers (video)

    Aug 2, 2015, 7:03 PM EDT

    Valeri Getty Images

    Diego Valeri missed a penalty as neither side could take advantage of its few big chances.

  14. Premier League friendly roundup: Southampton draws, Stoke swallowed

    Aug 2, 2015, 6:36 PM EDT

    Hughes Getty Images

    It was a tough day for a number of Premier League teams who suffered losses and setbacks, most notably Mark Hughes and Stoke City.

  15. Jack Wilshere to miss the start of the season with another ankle problem

    Aug 2, 2015, 5:25 PM EDT

    Wilshere Getty Images

    The 23-year-old midfielder has struggled with ankle problems in the past, and another has cropped up.

  16. Premier League 2015-16 season preview: West Ham United

    Aug 2, 2015, 5:00 PM EDT

    WestHamLogo

    Some big signings this summer and a new manager has fans excited for what could be this coming year.

  17. Premier League 2015-16 season preview: West Bromwich Albion

    Aug 2, 2015, 3:14 PM EDT

    WestBromLogo

    Tony Pulis is a hard-nosed leader, but unless Saido Berahino can repeat his goal-scoring year from last season, it will be a tough go for the Baggies.