Mar 27, 2013, 7:03 PM EDT
Let me pre-empt your comment and acknowledge: I know this is completely pointless. And in a way, that is the point.
I want to embrace the absurdity of looking too deep into early qualifying results. I want to see what the world would look like if Mexico kept struggling, Ghana didn’t get out of their group, or Portugal doesn’t track down Israel in Europe.
I want Uzbekistan’s name in draw, Venezuela in a finals, and nations like Montenegro and Bosnia-Herzegovina to breakthrough.
Most of all, I want some kind of reward for all of the international soccer we’ve been subjected to over the last five days. I want to know this is leading somewhere – that these constant jumps from the club world into this alternative reality will be rewarded. The only way for my frustrated, fatigued little mind to grasp the implications is to draw out the 2014 World Cup.
So here’s what I did: I took the current standings from qualifying tournaments around the world, assumed the teams’ points-per-game rates played out, and then “qualified” the appropriate teams for Brazil. When playoffs were needed, I went with FIFA’s higher rated team (for no other reason than to take my preferences out of the equation).
Beyond using FIFA ranking as a tiebreaker, I didn’t assume the good teams would automatically make it. Think Panama’s going to fade? Too bad. They’re in first now. Montenegro’s not going to win their group? Then they won’t part of the last time we do this exercise eight months from now. We’re living in the present, baby. Embrace the now!
Once the 32 teams were decided. I pulled out Brazil and the seven seeded teams (by FIFA ranking), and conducted the draw by normal procedures. The way it ended up after playoffs, eight European teams formed one pot, the African and South American teams formed another, while the Asian and CONCACAF teams formed the last.
And this is how it played out.
AGAIN, this is not meant to be anything other than a fun exercise. I don’t intend it to be predictive or in any way a reflection of anybody’s analysis. It’s just a goof.
|Group A||Group B|
|Group C||Group D|
|Group E||Group F|
|Group G||Group H|
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Perhaps once we’re further down the qualifying road we can put some analysis in this space, but we’re still a little too far down the road to be taking this too seriously. For now, it’s cool to seem some of the new names and potential groups …
… but for now, I leave the analysis to you.
May 28, 2015, 12:53 AM EDT
Juninho’s early PK is all the Galaxy need, as they climb to 4th in the Western Conference. RSL, meanwhile, are on the outside looking in.
May 28, 2015, 12:43 AM EDT
17 MLS teams will entire this year’s US Open Cup in the 4th round. On Wednesday, they learned who they’ll face.
May 28, 2015, 12:30 AM EDT
Wins in May don’t get much more “must-win” than this one. PDX tops the East’s top team.
May 27, 2015, 8:15 PM EDT
According to his agent, Balotelli is going nowhere this summer. He’ll stay and fight for his place next season.
May 27, 2015, 6:15 PM EDT
11 current and former officials from around the world have been provisionally banned from all football-related activities.
May 27, 2015, 5:23 PM EDT
Rog and Davo relive the Premier League’s season finale, including squeaky bum time at the bottom of the table.
May 27, 2015, 4:42 PM EDT
It was a thrilling Europa League final. Sevilla are back-to-back Europa League champions, and into next year’s Champions League.
May 27, 2015, 4:32 PM EDT
Sergio Aguero was the Premier League’s top goalscorer this season, but was he the best attacker in the league? He has plenty of competition.
May 27, 2015, 3:23 PM EDT
After leading the Black Cats to Premier League safety, “The Little General” has announced he won’t return to the Stadium of Light next season.
May 27, 2015, 3:00 PM EDT
Goal scorers, goal creators, ball winners, possession destroyers — the list of top-10 midfielders has a little bit of everything.
May 27, 2015, 2:43 PM EDT
“Today’s events are a disaster for FIFA and tarnish the image of football as a whole. “
May 27, 2015, 2:17 PM EDT
The most controversial figure in world soccer has broken his silence.
May 27, 2015, 2:08 PM EDT
If Aston Villa wants any shot at beating Arsenal in the FA Cup final this Saturday, Christian Benteke must come up big.
May 27, 2015, 1:06 PM EDT
“This really is the World Cup of fraud, and today we are issuing FIFA a red card.”
May 27, 2015, 12:00 PM EDT
With the Hoops heading down to the Championship, Queens Park Rangers will have a completely new look next season.
May 27, 2015, 11:10 AM EDT
They say defense wins championships, so expect to see quite a bit of Chelsea blue on this list.
May 27, 2015, 10:31 AM EDT
Atsu spent this season on loan at Everton, and it looks like the Ghanaian will be headed south to the Premier League’s newest club.
May 27, 2015, 9:40 AM EDT
Sepp Blatter has served as president for 17 years and is expected to easily win reelection.
May 27, 2015, 9:00 AM EDT
Let’s take a walk through the six yard box with the Premier League’s 10 best ‘keepers for 2014-15.
May 27, 2015, 8:30 AM EDT
A press conference is scheduled to be held at 10:30 a.m. ET from the U.S. Department of Justice.
- FIFA ethics committee bans 11 current, former officials from all football-related activities 3
- UEFA calls for postponement of FIFA presidential election, threatens to boycott congress 5
- FIFA president Sepp Blatter releases first statement since overnight arrests 11
- Three things we learned from the US Department of Justice news conference on the FIFA investigation 6
- FIFA presidential elections will go on Friday despite arrests 6
- FBI, US Department of Justice issues damning statement on FIFA, details corruption investigation 8