Mar 27, 2013, 7:03 PM EDT
Let me pre-empt your comment and acknowledge: I know this is completely pointless. And in a way, that is the point.
I want to embrace the absurdity of looking too deep into early qualifying results. I want to see what the world would look like if Mexico kept struggling, Ghana didn’t get out of their group, or Portugal doesn’t track down Israel in Europe.
I want Uzbekistan’s name in draw, Venezuela in a finals, and nations like Montenegro and Bosnia-Herzegovina to breakthrough.
Most of all, I want some kind of reward for all of the international soccer we’ve been subjected to over the last five days. I want to know this is leading somewhere – that these constant jumps from the club world into this alternative reality will be rewarded. The only way for my frustrated, fatigued little mind to grasp the implications is to draw out the 2014 World Cup.
So here’s what I did: I took the current standings from qualifying tournaments around the world, assumed the teams’ points-per-game rates played out, and then “qualified” the appropriate teams for Brazil. When playoffs were needed, I went with FIFA’s higher rated team (for no other reason than to take my preferences out of the equation).
Beyond using FIFA ranking as a tiebreaker, I didn’t assume the good teams would automatically make it. Think Panama’s going to fade? Too bad. They’re in first now. Montenegro’s not going to win their group? Then they won’t part of the last time we do this exercise eight months from now. We’re living in the present, baby. Embrace the now!
Once the 32 teams were decided. I pulled out Brazil and the seven seeded teams (by FIFA ranking), and conducted the draw by normal procedures. The way it ended up after playoffs, eight European teams formed one pot, the African and South American teams formed another, while the Asian and CONCACAF teams formed the last.
And this is how it played out.
AGAIN, this is not meant to be anything other than a fun exercise. I don’t intend it to be predictive or in any way a reflection of anybody’s analysis. It’s just a goof.
|Group A||Group B|
|Group C||Group D|
|Group E||Group F|
|Group G||Group H|
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Perhaps once we’re further down the qualifying road we can put some analysis in this space, but we’re still a little too far down the road to be taking this too seriously. For now, it’s cool to seem some of the new names and potential groups …
… but for now, I leave the analysis to you.
Oct 21, 2014, 12:10 AM EDT
Paderborn hasn’t stopped winning or scoring insane goals, if you haven’t noticed.
Oct 20, 2014, 11:29 PM EDT
Actor Mark Consuelos made his way to the Crap Part of Soho while the Men In Blazers tried to keep the ball out of their own net.
Oct 20, 2014, 10:47 PM EDT
Bayern Munich have a very difficult match on the road in Italy, while other matchups in Spain, Russia, and Germany will all prove enjoyable.
Oct 20, 2014, 9:28 PM EDT
Meghan Klingenberg bagged a laser beam for her first US goal and Abby Wambach grabbed two as the Americans will move on to the semifinals.
Oct 20, 2014, 8:42 PM EDT
Manchester Police confirmed a man was arrested after flying a drone over the match that entertained 45,000 people.
Oct 20, 2014, 8:00 PM EDT
Aron Johannsson bagged a penalty in his return from groin surgery, while Juan Agudelo continues to search for a new club.
Oct 20, 2014, 6:55 PM EDT
Adel Taarabt says the harsh words from manager Harry Redknapp are not only untrue but damaging as a professional.
Oct 20, 2014, 6:16 PM EDT
The New York Cosmos completed a massive signing, beating out a few of his former clubs to nab the Spanish legend as a player and coach.
Oct 20, 2014, 5:36 PM EDT
Despite a solid confirmation from Croatia, the friendly will reportedly not be happening.
Oct 20, 2014, 4:56 PM EDT
Manchester United came from behind twice but still must settle for a disappointing result away from home.
Oct 20, 2014, 4:35 PM EDT
19-year-old Lazio striker Keita Balde Diao somehow walked away from what looks to be a major accident. His Lamborghini, however, didn’t.
Oct 20, 2014, 3:20 PM EDT
Unruly fans will cost Wales and Galatasary as UEFA continues to crack down on off-the-pitch incidents.
Oct 20, 2014, 2:35 PM EDT
The yearly tournament organizes five-a-side matches for people that are homeless or living in extreme poverty.
Oct 20, 2014, 1:30 PM EDT
Liverpool, Everton and Swansea City are just a few of the Premier League clubs reportedly looking to sign the Marseille winger.
Oct 20, 2014, 12:37 PM EDT
With transfer rumors swirling, the Arsenal forward made it clear that he is #AlwaysAGunner.
Oct 20, 2014, 11:51 AM EDT
Amidst the Ebola outbreak, South Africa has ruled out hosting the continent’s premier tournament should Morocco back out.
Oct 20, 2014, 11:00 AM EDT
Sad news out of India as a young player died after injuring his spinal cord during a celebration.
Oct 20, 2014, 10:15 AM EDT
Ahmed Musa stirred the pot ahead of his club’s Champions League clash this week, calling out City’s form.
Oct 20, 2014, 9:30 AM EDT
Watch the Baggies take on Manchester United today, live at 3:00 p.m. ET on NBCSN.
Oct 20, 2014, 8:40 AM EDT
The Chelsea backup is teaching his replacement how to stay safe from head injuries, which have affected both keepers.
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