Mar 27, 2013, 7:03 PM EDT
Let me pre-empt your comment and acknowledge: I know this is completely pointless. And in a way, that is the point.
I want to embrace the absurdity of looking too deep into early qualifying results. I want to see what the world would look like if Mexico kept struggling, Ghana didn’t get out of their group, or Portugal doesn’t track down Israel in Europe.
I want Uzbekistan’s name in draw, Venezuela in a finals, and nations like Montenegro and Bosnia-Herzegovina to breakthrough.
Most of all, I want some kind of reward for all of the international soccer we’ve been subjected to over the last five days. I want to know this is leading somewhere – that these constant jumps from the club world into this alternative reality will be rewarded. The only way for my frustrated, fatigued little mind to grasp the implications is to draw out the 2014 World Cup.
So here’s what I did: I took the current standings from qualifying tournaments around the world, assumed the teams’ points-per-game rates played out, and then “qualified” the appropriate teams for Brazil. When playoffs were needed, I went with FIFA’s higher rated team (for no other reason than to take my preferences out of the equation).
Beyond using FIFA ranking as a tiebreaker, I didn’t assume the good teams would automatically make it. Think Panama’s going to fade? Too bad. They’re in first now. Montenegro’s not going to win their group? Then they won’t part of the last time we do this exercise eight months from now. We’re living in the present, baby. Embrace the now!
Once the 32 teams were decided. I pulled out Brazil and the seven seeded teams (by FIFA ranking), and conducted the draw by normal procedures. The way it ended up after playoffs, eight European teams formed one pot, the African and South American teams formed another, while the Asian and CONCACAF teams formed the last.
And this is how it played out.
AGAIN, this is not meant to be anything other than a fun exercise. I don’t intend it to be predictive or in any way a reflection of anybody’s analysis. It’s just a goof.
|Group A||Group B|
|Group C||Group D|
|Group E||Group F|
|Group G||Group H|
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Perhaps once we’re further down the qualifying road we can put some analysis in this space, but we’re still a little too far down the road to be taking this too seriously. For now, it’s cool to seem some of the new names and potential groups …
… but for now, I leave the analysis to you.
May 22, 2015, 12:02 AM EDT
Firing one of the world’s elite managers, so you can hire a good-but-not-great replacement? Not smart, Real Madrid, not smart at all.
May 21, 2015, 10:57 PM EDT
According to Scholes, the solution to Man United’s goalkeeping problem is a no-brainer.
May 21, 2015, 9:47 PM EDT
Well done to Tottenham Hotspur for showing the necessary compassion and taking care of one of their own.
May 21, 2015, 8:24 PM EDT
The draw for the 4th round of the 2015 US Open Cup tossed up a couple of absolute doozies on Thursday night.
May 21, 2015, 7:23 PM EDT
Jack Grealish has a big decision to make in the not-so-distant future, and it’s going to affect the course of the rest of his career.
May 21, 2015, 5:29 PM EDT
Thierry Henry is riding Olivier Giroud very hard these days, claiming Arsenal will never win a PL title with him leading the line.
May 21, 2015, 3:25 PM EDT
Qatar isn’t the only World Cup host to make others upset.
May 21, 2015, 2:33 PM EDT
Sponsors hold the one true key to change in Qatar, and strong words are a start.
May 21, 2015, 1:50 PM EDT
Many European leagues have spots in the big dance still up for grabs.
May 21, 2015, 1:10 PM EDT
Jordon Ibe and Jon Flanagan both will stick around Anfield for a while longer.
May 21, 2015, 12:27 PM EDT
Only one candidate remains to battle Sepp Blatter, and it doesn’t look good.
May 21, 2015, 11:30 AM EDT
The man who’s been investigated by the FBI and green lit loads of allegedly corrupt ideas will continue to rule your favorite sport.
May 21, 2015, 10:41 AM EDT
The announcement is the final touch of a poorly-kept secret, and comes with the Copa del Rey and UEFA Champions League on the horizon.
May 21, 2015, 9:57 AM EDT
The Impact will be looking for their third-straight Canadian Championship, having defeated TFC and Vancouver in recent campaigns.
May 21, 2015, 9:03 AM EDT
Ward said every club in the Premier League would bid for Sterling (who has already reportedly turned down an offer worth $235,000 a week).
May 21, 2015, 8:30 AM EDT
Phil Jones and Chris Smalling make it a trio of Manchester United players on the roster, while Arsenal paces all Premier League squads with four call-ups.
May 21, 2015, 7:46 AM EDT
There’s a guarantee that a fourth-tier side or lower will see the fourth round, thanks to a pair of surprise wins.
May 20, 2015, 11:10 PM EDT
Borussia Dortmund’s sporting director has said the prized defender will stay in Germany next season.
May 20, 2015, 10:01 PM EDT
A brace from Krisztian Nemeth led Sporting KC to an impressive win over a Revolution side that will leave Kansas City disappointed.
May 20, 2015, 9:03 PM EDT
With the Magpies in danger of relegation, supporters want owner Mike Ashley to sell the club.
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