Jul 29, 2014, 8:03 PM EDT
In one of the most shocking discoveries of the summer, Madrid-based newspaper AS has revealed that Radamel Falcao has begun following three Real Madrid players on Instagram.
Take a moment to catch your breath.
The report, which claims that the Colombian striker is now following Gareth Bale, Isco Alarcon and Sami Khedira, has sent shockwaves through the internet.
The significance of this bold social media move can not be understated – Falcao is on the next private jet to the Estadio Santiago Bernabéu. For months, nay years, rumors have been flying that Los Blancos were interested in buying the predatory striker known as El Tigre and now, we should all consider that deal as good as done.
It is of no importance that Falcao is currently recovering from knee surgery and is still on the mend, Madrid’s top-knotch social media investigators are clearly convinced he will return as good as new. His current club, AS Monaco, have spent the summer being peppered by rumors of Madrid’s desire to bring Falcao to the Spanish Giants, so much so that last week Monaco coach Leonardo Jardim uttered the dreaded concession: “At the moment, he is our player.”
That statement sent the higher-ups at Madrid into a tizzy, knowing their man was but a few pokes-and-prods away from caving in to their master plan. And now, if the almighty Instagram tea leaves are correct, it seems Madrid’s persistence has paid off.
But stop the presses.
Because I, too, have access to Instagram and after hours of investigative work have managed to uncover conflicting evidence to stoke the fire of silly season. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it appears that Mr. Falcao has been one bad boy because he also recently followed Carles Puyol, Lionel Messi, Wayne Rooney and Robin van Persie, meaning Madrid have stiff competition for Falcao’s signature from Barcelona and Manchester United.
And, as if the added competition wasn’t bad enough for Madrid, Falcao’s Instagram reveals yet another compelling interest: Babies. Yes, babies.
As more information on Falcao’s Instagram comes available, we’ll be sure to pass it along. But for now, he’s definitely deciding between Madrid, Barca, United and Babies.
Instagram. The best damn transfer rumor app in the world.
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